We're Shepherds But We're Also Sheep

This week at a training event, a pastor friend looked me dead in the eyes and said it, "Tim, people forget we're sheep too. And not just sheep—we're wounded sheep trying to shepherd other wounded sheep."

The silence that followed was deafening. Because he named what we all feel but never say.

The Brutal Truth Nobody Talks About

Can we be honest and admit we've created a system where shepherds aren't allowed to bleed?

Think about that for a second.

The very people called to bind up wounds are walking around with gaping ones of their own. Hidden under their Sunday best. Masked behind platform smiles. Buried beneath the weight of everyone else's expectations.

And we're dying because of it.

Not metaphorically. Literally.

Nearly 1 in 5 pastors contemplated suicide last year. Let that sink in. One in five of your colleagues wondered if death might be better than another day of this.

59% are clinically depressed.
91% have experienced burnout.
75% are "extremely" or "highly" stressed.

These aren't statistics. These are your friends. Your seminary buddies. Maybe you.

Why We Hide Our Wounds

You know why we stay silent, don't you?

Because vulnerability feels like vocational suicide.

Admit you're struggling? There goes your credibility. Show your wounds? There goes your authority. Ask for help? There goes your position.

So we perfect the art of bleeding internally while preaching healing externally. We become professional pretenders. Expert mask-wearers. Olympic-level sufferers in silence.

And here's the sick part: The church rewards us for it.

They call it "strength." They praise our "dedication." They admire our "sacrifice."

Meanwhile, we're slowly dying inside, one Sunday at a time.

The Biblical Paradox We Ignore

Scripture is brutally clear about this tension.

Peter tells us to "shepherd the flock" (1 Peter 5:2). But Jesus calls us sheep who need a shepherd (John 10). Paul says we're to be examples (1 Timothy 4:12). But he also boasts in his weaknesses (2 Corinthians 12:9). We're told to bear others' burdens (Galatians 6:2). But also to cast our own on Him (1 Peter 5:7).

You see the pattern?

We're both/and, not either/or. Shepherd AND sheep. Leader AND follower. Healer AND wounded. Strong AND weak.

But somewhere along the way, we bought the lie that we can only be one.

The Cost of Pretending

Here's what nobody calculates: When shepherds aren't allowed to be sheep, everyone loses.

Your congregation gets a performer, not a pastor. Your family gets your leftovers, not your best. Your soul gets depleted, not restored. The Kingdom gets a martyr, not a multiplier.

And you? You get to slowly die while everyone applauds your "faithfulness." This isn't ministry. It's Ministry Cancer™. And it's metastasizing through the Body of Christ at an alarming rate.

 Imagine a different reality: What if you had a place where you didn't have to hide? What if you had people who saw your wounds and didn't run? What if vulnerability was seen as strength, not weakness? What if you could be both shepherd AND sheep without shame? What if you could bleed without losing your calling?

This isn't a pipe dream. It's possible.

But it requires something radical: Admitting you need to be pastored too.

Your Permission Slip

So let me be crystal clear: You have permission to be human. You have permission to hurt. You have permission to need help. You have permission to be a wounded sheep.

Your wounds don't disqualify you from shepherding. They qualify you.

Because a shepherd who's never been lost can't really guide the wandering. A shepherd who's never been wounded can't really bind up the broken. A shepherd who's never needed rescue can't really throw the lifeline.

Your wounds are part of your calling, not contrary to it.

But here's the thing: Recognition without action is just self-pity. You need more than permission. You need a plan. You need safe people who can handle your truth. Rhythms that restore, not just maintain. Boundaries that protect your soul. Systems that work without you being the hero. An identity rooted in who you are, not what you do.

This isn't optional. It's survival.

What would happen if we flipped the script? What if churches started caring for their shepherds the way shepherds care for their sheep? What if denominations measured pastoral health, not just church growth? What if seminary taught self-care alongside systematic theology? What if vulnerability from the pulpit was seen as courage, not weakness? What if we stopped sacrificing shepherds on the altar of ministry success?

The revolution starts with you.

Not with them.
Not with the system.
Not with the denomination.

With you deciding you're worth saving. With you choosing to stop the bleeding. With you admitting you're a sheep who needs tending too.

A Word to the Wounded

 If you're reading this with tears in your eyes, know this: You're not alone. You're not too far gone. You're not beyond healing.

Those statistics I shared? Behind every number is a pastor who thought they were the only one struggling. They weren't. You aren't.

The wounds you carry don't make you weak. They make you human. The pain you feel doesn't make you faithless. It makes you real. The help you need doesn't make you a failure. It makes you wise.

Stop bleeding alone.

Find your people. Get help. Start healing.

Because the Kingdom doesn't need more martyrs. It needs shepherds who know how to be sheep. It needs leaders who know how to be led. It needs healers who know how to be healed.

It needs you—whole, healthy, and honest about your humanity.

 The choice is yours. Will you keep pretending until you become another statistic? Or will you admit what's always been true: You're a shepherd, yes. But you're also a sheep. And sheep need tending too.

If you're ready to stop bleeding alone, here's where to start:

Take the Ministry Health Assessment. It's free. It's confidential. And it'll show you exactly where Ministry Cancer® has taken root in your life and ministry. More importantly, it'll show you there's a way forward. Take the Assessment →

Join a Pastor's Cohort. You need a safe place with other wounded shepherds who get it. No masks. No pretense. Just real pastors doing real healing together. Our next cohort starts soon. Learn About Cohorts →

Talk to Someone Today. Sometimes you just need to hear another human say, "I get it. You're not alone. There's hope." If you're at the end of your rope, don't wait. Schedule a Call →

You don't have to keep bleeding in silence. You don't have to keep pretending you're fine. You don't have to die for ministry to matter.

There's another way. And it starts with admitting the truth: You're a wounded sheep who needs tending too.

We're here when you're ready. ◼︎

The Authentic Pastor is a comprehensive life and leadership development organization that helps pastors and churches achieve lasting growth through their proven WholeCare™ system, offering coaching, cohorts, and consulting services. We're passionate about supporting church leaders throughout their entire career journey—from early challenges to long-term success—with the goal of creating healthier pastors and more effective ministries.

See how we can help you right now:

→ Take the Free Ministry Health Assessment
→ Join a 6-Month Cohort
→ Find a Certified TAP Coach
→ Schedule a Free 30-Minute Call
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